Training Log Archive: Bash

The Domestic Pig, aka Goose's Big Birthday Extravaganza - Part 1

This year the Wild BOAR was replaced with an impressive celebration of Goose's 50th birthday, masterminded by Coach LD. We were asked to wear goose or bird-themed costumes.

Mother Goose, aka Coach LD, has written a terrific report on the event so I'm going to focus on photos.



'Bent came as Goose from Top Gun and won the costume portion of the competition. (Naturally, there were winners and losers at this birthday party; that's how we roll in Caledon.)



Mr. and Mrs. Biker.



Bullseye and VO2Max.



Think Galapagos Islands... I was a blue-footed booby.



And Goose came as Goose. He hadn't been informed about the need to wear a costume; some parts of the day were meant to be a surprise.



After a decadent bacon and eggs breakfast, we portaged to the Humber River.



Weather was perfect and the water was moving well.



There were clues written on flagging tape along the river, each of which involved the performance of a charade that pointed us to the next clue. Often it was a location along the river that only Goose would know, e.g. "Swimming lessons".







One of the exciting aspects of the Humber is that the obstructions change over time. We portaged around this fallen tree but a couple of teams ahead of us got tangled in it. With a current running, it can be hard to extract a boat from a mess of branche.



Goose made an impressive effort to clear the way, sending huge logs downstream. It was a terrific party trick but the portage was still the better route choice. It was right at this moment that Phatty called Goose via Facetime from France so he saw some of us in our boats, and we had the chance to wave and shout, "Bonjour!"



When we arrived at Goose Senior's place, the clue directed us to ask Goose to demonstrate his favourite canoe gymnastics move. Wow!



Until this moment, I hadn't realized what a sheltered paddling life I have led.



Next there were 50 candles by the driveway that we had to light on a breezy day, then Goose tried to blow them out with a single breath.



Then we went on an expedition in the Humber Valley where it seemed that every second clue took us to a place where Goose had come close to getting killed as a child. Until that moment, I hadn't understood what a miracle it was that he managed to reach his 50th birthday. It was fascinating to hear some wild stories we'd never heard before - like the time he flipped his kayak and got stuck in a farmer's wire fence while upside down and under water.



Then there was the time someone dared him to walk across ice on a swimming pool but he broke though. The other boys ran for their Mom, former longtime Caledon Mayor Carol Seglins, who ran across the road, dove into the pool and pulled him up just as he started to sink. You can bet that if a federal politician had done something like that, everyone across the country would hear about it. But we've known Carol for many years - and Goose too - and have never heard this story.









Then the boys and girls split up to follow different clues around the valley in Bolton. (As if Coach LD didn't have enough to do today!)



We met up with additional goose-themed friends on Bolton's main street. That's Crash on the left!



One of many reasons to be glad I was on the girls' team... we had to buy a mandatory ice cream at the local shop.



We headed back to the Doughtys' place to transition to bikes. We were going to ride to Palgrave via Caledon East with various stops and tasks along the way.

I hadn't ridden my bike much since it got banged around at Tierra Viva but I'd taken it out a couple of times. At first today, it felt like I wasn't properly in gear, then it felt like the chain had fallen off. I stopped to check it out, and since I've been learning more about bikes lately, I'm proud to say that I correctly identified my rear derailleur and knew it was a Really Bad Thing when it disintegrated in my hand.



Mr. Biker and 'Bent worked together to try to replace my SRAM XO with an X9 that 'Bent happened to have lying around. Unfortunately, a small piece was missing so I was forced to DNF. 'Bent and I took it to a bike shop so it would be ready for STORM The Trent, then we drove to Palgrave with 'Bent's bike to rejoin the party.



VO2Max and Bullseye had planned a serious competition in his back field including Feats of Strength, tug of war and a golf driving contest. I'm sure our team probably won but I can't remember the details. ;)

Then I drove a few people back to Bolton to get the dinner party started. 'Bent rode back with the group, as did Goose. Unfortunately, Goose hit a pothole and broke his wrist. (For purposes of this photo, I asked him to smile as if he had already reached the day when he would look back on this and laugh.)



Although this was not an auspicious way to mark his big birthday, he chose not to miss his own party so he didn't go to the hospital until the next morning. Luckily, one of the guests was an emergency physician so he got good advice.



The always-creative Crash baked Domestic Pig cupcakes.



Coach LD designed the Domestic Pig birthday cake.



Poems were read, advice was given for how to live the next 50 years, songs were sung, candles were blown out, hugs were exchanged and much was eaten. Coach LD always puts on a creative party but she really outdid herself this time. Happy Birthday, Goose!



Time deducted for charades, reading clues, listening to stories of Goose's startlingly frequent near-death experiences, candle lighting, watching Goose perform canoe gymnastics, golf, ice cream eating and much more.

The Domestic Pig, Part 2

The Domestic Pig, Part 3
No, that's not a mistake. My derailleur disintegrated one minute into the bike section.

The Domestic Pig, Feats of Strength and Special Challenges
- Overhead squats with heavy log
- Tug of war X 2 (losing team X 2)